Midterms are coming up next week, so if I weren’t already living, breathing, and sleeping science, I am now. The central nervous system, visceral innervation, interventricular foramena, GusB, Caenorhabditis elegans, MALDI-TOF mass spectrometry*, and complement pathways are staging an effective coup of my brain. Last night it came to a head with a detailed dream of taking out Chancellor Genji (my sixth class is classical Japanese literature) with an intricate interplay of Heian court politics and deployment of some sort of oversize flow cytometer, so it seemed time to capitulate and open the floodgates of my brain to science geekery. Given that I already think “hey! Drosophilla melanogaster, wild type +/0!” when I see a fruitfly in the kitchen, there wasn’t all that much left for science to take over. Humor seemed the only holdout.

No longer.

Moving backwards from Aaron Diaz tshirts emblazoned with “I roll with the ape” (these need to exist!) and Kate Beaton’s Tesla: the Celibate Scientist, we now have a (not so) classy range of (often pseudo) scientific jeers, jabs, and bon mots:

“You’re one neuron short of a synapse.”

“You need PCR to find your brain.”

“I’m gonna go *restriction enzyme* on yo @$$!”

“I:your mother::C3:PAMPs”

alternatively “your mother:me::C’:IgM”

“His brain’s in his sacrum”

“hit below the T10”

“my affinity >> your avidity”

The MadScienceLibs rubric will follow. Tune in next week.

*MALDI-TOF: matrix-assisted laser desorption ionization time-of-flight mass spectrometry. It’s really cool, actually. It involves mirrors and lasers and tiny clocks and is therefore an excellent toy, though perhaps not as inspired as plasmon resonance, but that’s only to be expected. 🙂